If it’s not your journey, don’t steer the wheel. 

***** Note: I’m not informed enough to speak about Planned Parenthood. I only know that the current situation has once again brought the issue of  abortion back to the hot seat.

Well, here I go. I’m about to shoot myself in eye, but I can’t be quiet anymore. (Well, ever.) I am not out to change people’s religious beliefs. I’m not trying to say that I’m right and you’re wrong. I do have something RADICAL and OPEN to say about the A- word. I’m not talking about donkeys here, people. I’m talking about abortion. According to my Facebook feed (because, let be real, it’s uncomfortable party chiit chat conversation) I have an overwhelming number of friends  who are vehemently opposed. I have a handful of friends who would cover their cars in pro-choice stickers if they weren’t in fear of the safety of their passengers. I’m willing to bet that I have many friends that are smack dab in the middle. I may be abusing my power as my sister’s spokesperson but her story begins and ends with abortions that could have been. Molly was carried for 9 months by a woman who did not want her. She could have easily made the choice to terminate her pregnancy. I’m thankful every moment that she made the choice to sacrifice her life so that each member of my family got to experience the pure bliss of being in the presence of her fetus. In the ironic hot mess that is my family’s story, 18 years later, an abortion could have extended the life of that precious child that was saved by a woman’s right to choose not to have an abortion. Do I think Molly would have jumped at the opportunity to terminate the lives inside her? Absolutely not. Unfortunately, it was not an option. It wasn’t an option because she didn’t tell anyone she was pregnant. It wasn’t an option because she was only 18 for one month of her pregnancy. She fell between the cracks. Had Molly told me that she was pregnant, I would have sold all of my purses, shoes, and jewelry on EBay to give her the option. Had I known that I had a choice between those babies that I still ache to hold and that precious creature who helped create them, I would have chosen life. I would have chosen the life of the girl who led people to Christ all around the globe. I would have chosen life for the girl who could make a room light up with her piercing blue eyes and infectious spirit. I would have chosen life for the human that completed our life. I would not have allowed one mistake to end a story in the exposition. I’m no Fertile Myrtle, more like Sterile Stanley. Molly was going to carry my children. I would have raised those babies. If I had been given the option? I’d have chosen my baby sister.

Abortion is not a cut and dry issue. It’s not an issue that we can say for certain how we believe unless we’ve been faced with the choice personally. (So by that logic, I’m not qualified to say my stance because this hypothetical choice would have been my choice by proxy.) I believe women should have access to qualified medical professionals for all areas of reproductive health. From birth control to fertility treatments to abortions, women should have a safe choice. I’ve cried with friends struggling with fertility problems. What kind of friend would I be if I said, “Clearly, God doesn’t want you to have a baby. You shouldn’t be playing God and putting those embryos in yourself”? I’ve laid in bed with a friend mourning the loss of her aborted child. I’ve watched her grieve and wrestle with her decision, rebuild her life, and become the most amazing mom on Earth. Did I have friends who were struggling with infertility at the time? Yep. Did I resent my friend for not carrying her child for them? Nope. Because I have experienced that children come into our lives by birth and adoption at exactly the right time.

MollyROCK isn’t saying that you should be pro-choice. We do, however, ask that you realize that pro-choice does not mean, “pro-abortion.” More often than not, the decision to have an abortion is not made blindly or without heartache. The absences of abortions have quite literally built and demolished my soul. Radically, I want to beg my friends who are pro-life to stop sucking the life out of women who have made the choice to end their pregnancies.  Remove the planks from your eyes, people. (Or cataracts, let me know if you need one taken out– I have a guy.) As Christians, we are called to be KIND, like Jesus. You don’t have to agree with everyone and their choices, but you do have to respect the laws and the fact that you do not know every story of every woman who has ever conceived. Be radical, open, and kind as this debate ebbs once again. Every time I see a Facebook post criminalizing what could have saved my sister, my heart breaks a little more.

More than meat loves salt,

EGG (even if mine aren’t viable)


One comment

  1. Ellen Garner · August 11, 2015

    I chose to have an abortion when I was 20 and living in Atlanta and barely eking out a living. Having a child by a boyfriend who already had a child was out of the question. After consulting with friends and family, I made the decision to end the pregnancy. I had to travel to Washington, D. C. where it was legal at that time. My dear, beloved sister, Nancy, took me in and consoled me that weekend and made sure I got back home safely. When I arrived back in Atlanta, my boyfriend was gone. All of his stuff was removed from my apartment and I never heard from him again. I must give him some credit; he paid for half the cost. I wasn’t mature enough to care for myself, much less an innocent baby. I have changed my views about abortion since then, but I believe that every woman should have the choice. The church and the government should bow out when it comes to personal decisions as this one.


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